Happy and Sad

Surrealism becomes reality pretty quickly. i really still don't know
how she feels. In fact i don't really know that much about her. The
small things that i DO know leads me to really wild crazy assumptions
which are really too crazy to write down or assume out loud. STILL i
don't care as i have never been in a situation like this before (and
i'm also crazy about her) and probably might never will. She told me
she's goin away forever, and i don't know how to react. She said she
should of told me sooner. i don't really believe her simple reason on
WHY she is moving away. BUT moving away forever means that it would
probably end. i think i am crazy about her and would probably want to
go with her. i somehow have an instinctal feeling that she won't
allow that and this relationship is just a small casual goodbye fling
to her. Although it does upset me, i am still really happy coz she
said stuff to me that only couples should hear. To be honest i never
expected words like that to ever reach a person like me. It really
meant a lot to me. i'm so pathetic. Its stupid coz even though we
talked last night, i miss her already. i have no idea why she takes
so long to reply to a msg. i really hate waiting. i told a workmate
that "i feel like the most happiest and saddest person in the world"
and he said "thats quite a contrast". Yes indeed.