Enjoy life?

i think i know whats wrong with me at the moment. i'm not enjoying my
life. i'm also not doing anything about it either. And its because
that i'm not enjoying it, its forcing me to stay that way. In a hole i
created. i SHOULD be doing important things, like finding a career
job, find a way to move out, but i CAN'T. i keep putting myself down
so much that its now really hard to try. i'm also distracted by
things like quick money and relationships. It really sucks to be me. i
wish i was happier, but i have nothing really to be happy about. i'm
not the guy who drinks a lot but who knows? In the future i might
become some overweight alcoholic slob on a couch. i cannot really see
the future. While i was in uni i saw it probably ending up 6 feet
under before i reached 21. But now that i AM 21 and going on 22 is it
any different? Perhaps i should take comfort in knowing that i didn't
have the guts in the past and probably never will.