If i kill myself...

If i do kill myself, i want people to know that for me to kill myself, i would of have to been very sad. So people should take comfort in knowing that i wouldn't be sad anymore if i am gone, whether i disappear completely or if i am in heaven or hell. If i kill myself its because i can't live on with my life anymore so i would probably be doing the right thing to leave and just disappear. Therefore i don't want people to be sad, disappointed or angry that i am gone because they should know that i won't be sad anymore. i also would prefer to be cremated because that would save space. i don't care what happens with my ashes. i'm not gonna kill myself yet, so anybody reading this should not be worried. i'm just writing down my thoughts as they come.